For the past week we have been noticing a trend developing in his sleep routine. Around 7 pm he starts getting tired and fusses. I try to nurse him, I rock him, I read him stories, and so on. This takes about 30-45 minutes. I try to put him down in his crib and he immediately wakes. Jared then takes over and bounces/rocks him for another 30-45 minutes. He will try to put him down several times and finally at about the 3rd or 4th try Elliott will stay asleep. Or, he will wake up after a short time and we have to rock him again but only for a short time.
Obviously this cannot become a trend so I have decided that Elliott is entitled to a certain amount of "coddling" I call it, but then when we have been spending upwards of 2 hours trying to get him to sleep in a peaceful way, enough is enough and he's on his own.
Tonight I did my routine for about 40 minutes and he woke as soon as I put him down. I hadn't even had dinner yet so I shut the door and went downstairs to eat and relax.
10-15 minutes later the crying stopped and I find him passed out, arms splayed out, completely zonked. We think he has extra energy he needs to get out of his system sometimes, because when we let him cry for a little bit (always just fussy crying not sobbing crying) he usually is much more tired and much easier to put to sleep. I definitely feel sorry for him when he cries and is upset but when we have already spent an hour coddling him I begin to feel like he is just being silly.
Anyway moral of this story is that I definitely do not want him getting used to mommy and daddy spending multiple hours a night lulling him further and further into a deep sleep so I am going to be putting a cap on the coddling after awhile at bedtime.
We'll see - I know sleep patterns always change for babies but I just don't want him getting used to a 2-hour long bedtime routine when he is already tired from the beginning!
I can see how it would be hard not to want to coddle that cute face!
ReplyDeleteAlso, we were talking in class about how distressing it can be for a mom to have your baby cry... even though of course it is normal and necessary sometimes. But somehow it got likened to having your spouse cry for hours at a time every day- and of course that would be distressing... but in a much weirder/intense way. Anyways- random thought- midwifery discussion classes are always interesting ;)
yeah we were saying we think it would be way more distressing if we could hear him throughout the whole house, but luckily when we go downstairs we barely can. if i could hear him i would have a harder time letting it happen i'm sure. maybe it helps too that i've never been as attentive in certain ways as i think other moms are sometimes, like how some moms say they feel the urge to check on the baby throughout the night, or have the monitor to hear them breathing, but i guess i don't feel that same urge to do those things for some reason.
DeleteFor sleep training, it's best to stay consistent. So if he cried yesterday, try sticking to it for a few days straight so that he might learn something (so that he won't get to the point of crying anymore).
ReplyDeleteluckily i did the bath, books, and rocking and he was out for good the first time without crying. but yea i plan to let him cry if i've gone through his routine and it still doesn't work. he's old enough now to "get it", i can tell, and i don't want any manipulation to kick in. last night he slept 6.5 hours straight for the first stretch which was his longest length of time all in a row so far! i hope it keeps getting longer too
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